Going through a divorce can be devastating experience. A whole array of emotions can make it tough to handle the big decisions that come with it. Listed here are the biggest mistakes a divorcing couple can make; along with some tips that can help you avoid these blunders yourself.
Bad-Mouthing Your Ex
It’s never in good taste to share the details of your ex’s misconduct, especially in front of your children. It’s damaging and insulting to the children as well as to your ex. To avoid this stress, never talk about your ex unfavorably and always encourage your children to maintain a relationship with your ex.
Forcing Your Children to Take Sides
Divorce is painful for everyone, but forcing your children to choose between you and the other parent will only make it more painful for them. Periods of high emotion and turmoil can make it tempting to “punish” those that are causing you to feel that way, but using the kids as pawns for your revenge will be catastrophic, and sets them up to resent you as well as their other parent. Instead, remind your children how much both of you love them and never make them pick sides.
Avoid immediately going into a serious relationship with anyone new. It might seem like a good idea to have a romantic distraction, but it may cause more harm than good. Emotionally, you are nowhere near being ready to give the other person what they deserve in a relationship. Also, bringing a new “parent” prematurely into your children’s lives will be confusing and cause further upheaval to their lives. It’s crucial that you take time to rebuild yourself and to mourn the loss of your marriage.
Trying to Be the Financial Winner
The battle over property is a hard one to win. Spending money on a lawyer to obtain the flat-screen tv or the living room set will only cause you to be in debt. The lawyers are the only ones who come out ahead in that situation. It’s best to not be short-sighted by focusing all your attention on being the “winner”. Instead, try to come to an amicable agreement with your ex outside of the courtroom so you two can concentrate on more important things, like the children.